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SEPTEMBER 20TH, 2013 A BI-WEEKLY WEBPAPER ISSUE 20

ADVICE
The founder of Don Giovanni Records answers questions about planning a punk rock wedding and going off the effing grid / by Joe S.

1. Life gets so overwhelming sometimes. So many tweets and tags and torrents. Have you ever thought about just going off the effing grid and moving into a shack in the middle of the forest? Ugh.

Hi! I think about this all the time, but then I think about all the positive things society has to offer us like friends and family and how much good can come from life. The idea of giving up on everyone and moving into a shack in the woods just seems incredibly selfish to me. I'd rather use my time here doing whatever I could to help make life better for me and people around me. If I fail at least I tried.

2. I trying to pretend to like football to hang out with this cool girl I just met who really digs the Steelers. What team should I pretend to like and why? And what are some cool sports phrases I could yell out while we watch a game together to seem legit?

Listen, if you really like this person you want to be yourself around her. You’ll have a better time with her, not to mention grow closer to her, by letting her teach you about the sport of football than going in there awkwardly hoping she doesn’t find out you know nothing about the game. If you are watching with her and find it boring, don’t fake an interest, let that be her thing. Hopefully you’ll generally find the sport interesting enough though that you have a steady stream of questions about what the hell is going on and she will be able to answer them for you.

3. How do I plan a totally punk rock wedding?

Congratulations! While your first instinct may be to plan a punk wedding that ignores all the stuffy traditional stuff that adults like in favor of stuff that you and your partner actually think is cool, the problem is that you still want your family to have as much of a good time as you and your friends. While a wedding feels like it’s your big day, it's also a big day for your parents and grandparents who have probably waited their entire lives to see you get married. That’s important to remember when considering wearing a flannel down the aisle while a thrash band plays. As cool as that notion or a similar one might sound to you, for your parents that’s basically how cool the notion of a super traditional boring-ass wedding sounds to you. You might want to consider a tiered system where you have a stuffy traditional party geared toward your family and relatives but which you also invite your friends to, followed by something which is geared towards you and your friends where a cool band plays and someone DJs songs you actually like. You and your partner will have fun at both and so will your friends. Its basically win-win.

4. I just moved to a new city and don't know that many people. Do you have any advice for how to not look awkward/creepy at shows when I go by myself? I'm not super shy but approaching people is weird, and I just don't want to seem like that weird girl who shows up to everything alone, even though, like, whatever. Who cares?

It may not feel this way, but no one thinks you look awkward and creepy when you are at a show alone, in fact, people don’t even notice you're alone. I know how weird it feels in between bands to just be standing around alone or in a corner alone or something like that and it feels like everyone is talking with their friends about “who is that weirdo over there alone?” but that is in fact not the case. The best advice is to develop self-comfort with being alone because no one else will think anything of it. If it makes you feel really uncomfortable no matter how hard you try to convince yourself otherwise, take a walk around the block between bands or something. Meeting people at shows though is also a lot easier than it may seem, since while on one hand they can be a pretty tight knit community so you may feel like an outsider for not knowing anyone, everyone is there for a pretty niche common interest. Nothing is wrong with going up to someone and talking about the band that just played, a shirt they're wearing, or even just being like “hey, I don’t really know anyone here.”


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